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I think I'm depressed

I've never been depressed in my life...even when I had things to be depressed about, but man, I feel just terrible. I STILL have morning sickness and the fatigue is brutal. This baby hates me or something. I am finding it hard to fake it for my kids and that makes me feel worse. I just want to lay in bed or on the couch and have everyone leave me alone.

Please...this has to get better...SOON!!

Enjoying the quiet at work...

but wish I had a cot or something. Man, I'm tired of being TIRED. Ho hum...

The dreaded belly pics

Since we still haven't told my family that we are PG, I thought I'd post a few picture here. Pretty pathetic of me that I was feeling so badly at 6 weeks I never took any pictures. There is quite a difference between weeks 4 and 8, though. YIKES. I started this pregnancy a little heavier too, so I guess I better just get used to it. I think I was around 146 pounds this time. With Jacob I started at 143 pounds (more muscle, less fat), with Nicholas is was WAY too skinny at 134 pounds (too much stress). If you want to see the other pictures they are on our family website (which honestly hasn't been touched in a year and a half because I need the new version of FrontPage for our computer with Vista (BOO). http://www.jbgresham.net/. Sign-in: guest, password: gresham88.

Wow...time flies

Sorry I haven't posted ANYTHING here in SO long. I had such high hopes for this to be my venting ground about wanting baby #3, but I guess I have a pretty good support group of ladies who helped me with this.

That being said, I can say BABY #3 is ON THE WAY!!! And...man...I feel terrible. I am due on August 4th, 2009. I have been SICK, SICK, SICK, since 5 weeks. YUCK. Last week it got so bad that my midwife called in some anti-nausea meds for me that they use for Chemotherapy and Radiation patients. They have definitely helped, but I still feel gruddy. I guess Nicholas spoiled me by not making me sick. I pretty much ate what I wanted. The nurse I talked to last week is predicting this IS my daughter "because sometimes girls just don't get along" and they make their mom's sick. LOL. Let's hope so.

I am not sure if I posted about us trying Dr. Shettle's theory to try for a girl this time, but we did and I think our timing was pretty good...2.5 days before O. I honestly was shocked that we got PG the first month again. I thought this was going to take longer...and actually was counting on that, so I wouldn't be sick for the Holidays. Don't get me wrong, I'm VERY happy to be so lucky in getting pregnant. We are truelly blessed. I just can't wait until I feel better.

So, my big problem is how to tell my family. I know this will sound TERRIBLE, but I fear my parents aren't going to be all happy about this. They are the type of people that are always practical and frugal and make the smart choice. Clearly in the current economy, having a baby now may not be the "smartest" thing to do, but DAMN, tell my heart that. I have to admit I'm a little nervous about money, but I've already got childcare figured out...YAY for Jacob starting Kindergarten in September.

Anyway, I want them to be happy for us. DH has been AWESOME, I must say. With the first two pregnancies he left something to be desired, but he has really grown up since we had Jacob. He has been very supportive, since I've been sick, which is such a relief. It is SO hard to chase my boys while I feel like I've been run over by a truck. Honestly, it feels like a mild case of the flu, but it stays and stays and stays.

He said yes to Baby #3!!!

I am sort of surprised and then sort of not. :) My DH is a great guy and loves our boys so much. I really hoped that if I shared with him how much I still thought about another baby he's be on board, but I was so scared of the possibility he'd be against it that I kept putting it off. Silly girl!! We are good for January 2009 to TTC. YAY. We are going to try the Shettle's method to see if we can get a girl this time. That means I need to stop BCP after this pack and chart for the next 4 months.

Can you tell I'm excited?!

My little man turns 2 tomorrow!!

I can't even believe it has been two years already. At this moment 2 years ago I was starting to have contractions, but for some reason was trying to sleep through them. I had walked literally 6 miles earlier in the day trying to get things moving, to no avail. Of course, when I was too exhausted to want to do anything other than sleep, the real thing started. I think I called my mom around midnight to come and stay with Jacob and DH & I headed to the hospital around 2 am. Nicholas was born at 7:25 am on 8/11/06.

He was SO much fun today too...which was a nice break of the crabby 2's. I hope tomorrow is the same, since I'm taking both he and his big brother (who is 4 years old) to the zoo. The weather is supposed to cooperate at least. YAY.

I'll try to find a couple of my favoriate pics of Nick and post them below. I have to admit they aren't that recent, since I REALLY need to download the camera!!